Kurt Smith, Psy.D., LMFT, LPCC, AFC. Each of us is responsible for our own happiness, so don’t allow someone else to control yours. However, if by “forgive and forget” one means, “I will act as if the sin had never occurred and live as if I don’t remember it,” then we can run into trouble. And on Facebook and on Google+ . Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. This is why I have named the title of this article, “Forgive and Forget.” Not only must you fully forgive both yourself and others for their past sins and mistakes, but you must also learn how to forget them, which means to let these past sins go and not keep thinking about them or keep bringing them back up and throwing them back in other people’s faces. For all of us who have been wounded by another and struggled to understand and move beyond our feelings of hurt and anger, Lewis Smedes's classic book on forgiveness shows that it is possible to heal our pain and find room in our hearts to forgive. To forgive and forget is a well-known idiom, which has rarely been looked at empirically.

Does forgiving help us to put aside disturbing thoughts—to forget—or does forgetting empower us to forgive? Forgiveness and Healing. A team of psychological scientists at the University of St. Andrews, Scotland, have … Determine what each relationship in your life means to you.

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Experts who study or teach forgiveness make clear … * However, as a fellow caregiver, I … What exactly does that mean and how do I do it? How to forgive and forget So we first have to ask ourselves What is anger? We learn by trial and error, and the errors are made by us and others. A sample of Bosnian Muslims (N = 180) were asked to report their readiness to forgive the misdeeds committed by Bosnian Serbs during the 1992–95 war in Bosnia and Herzegovina.

There is an art to learning how to forgive and possibly forget. It would also be interesting to know whether inducing people to forget details of an event would influence their tendency to forgive. For example, a rape victim can choose to forgive the rapist, but that does not mean she should act as if that sin had never happened.
Please note I majored in music/classical piano, not medicine, psychiatry, or psychology. In the current experiment, we investigated differences between emotional and decisional forgiveness on forgetting. Why is it that some of us find it easier to forgive and forget than others?

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